So I do have a rant that has been building ever since I gave birth... I wish people would stop scolding me like I'm a twelve year old incapable of making intelligent decisions. After having Levi, my blood pressure skyrocketed and as a result, I had to be kept in the hospital for an extra day until it was under control. Then, 10 days after I had him, I woke up with severe chest pains and went in to the ER in the middle of the night to have it checked out. Some people looked at these facts alone, decided I wasn't taking very good care of myself, and jumped all over me for it. However, the details are a little more complex...
I had preeclampsia when I was pregnant with Glenna. If you don't know what this is, it's a condition triggered by pregnancy in some women that results in elevated blood pressure, higher than average weight gain and water retention, and a higher risk for low birth weight babies. Even though I had this condition, my doctor was very impressed with how I did the whole time. I only gained 17 pounds, my blood pressure didn't go up until 37 weeks when she induced me, and Glenna was very healthy. If she thought that was impressive, she couldn't believe how I did during my second pregnancy. I was considered high risk because of the first pregnancy, but my blood pressure was excellent the entire time. I didn't retain water or swell up, and I gained twelve pounds. Twelve pounds. The baby weighed nine! (And that is excellent for me to have such a big baby with the hightened risk of low birth weight.) She induced me at 39 weeks this time, not for medical reasons, but because the baby was so big. She could not stop talking about how incredible I did the entire pregnancy and how healthy I and the baby both were. That being said, the blood pressure going up after I gave birth was a delayed reaction to the pregnancy, not anything I did wrong. In fact, I couldn't have done any better, according to my doctor. Still, well-meaning friends and family blasted me for not taking it easy enough or trying hard enough to get it to go down so I could go home. I had NO control over my blood pressure! It was directly related to my pregnancy, and it went down on its own when my body flushed out the extra fluids from pregnancy.
Then there was the chest pain. I first experienced this pain the day after having Levi. I chalked it up to sore muscles and didn't worry too much about it. I did mention it to the nurses, who didn't seem too concerned either. A week later it returned much worse (so bad I couldn't breathe and I was vomiting.) I went to the ER, where they did every cardiac test possible. My blood pressure was fine, the EKG came back perfect, chest x-rays showed nothing, and blood tests came back normal. The doctor told me that if the pain returns, I need to have my gallbladder checked out. After some research on my own, I am convinced that this is the problem. My symptoms are identical to those described as a gallbladder attack and I'm finding that for some unknown reason, it is very common for women to have problems with their gallbladder immediatly after giving birth. However, I was again verbally blasted when people found out I was in the ER with chest pain. They completely ignored the fact that nothing was wrong with my heart or blood pressure and assumed that I was again neglecting to care for myself (and in the process, my new baby.) Due to the reaction I recieved, I haven't been telling anyone that the pains have been continuing- I'm probably going to be talking to my doctor about surgery soon.
It just irritated me how many people accused me of making poor decisions medically while completely ignoring the facts. I am perfectly capable of caring for myself (not to mention my children) and don't need to be put on a guilt trip for things that are totally out of my control. Thankfully, my close friends and family were good about not harping on me or blaming me for all that has happened these past two weeks. I'm dreading the onslaught if I have to have surgery soon. Why can't people offer to help instead of ripping me apart if they're so "concerned"?
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